Plop, Plop…Squish, Squish…Oh What A Relief It Is!


Have I ever told you guys that I work at the spider factory? You’ve never heard of such a thing, you ask? Well, it’s an office building with about twenty-three

Double ick!

employees where the day-to-day operations of a business are run. It’s a very nice place, but lurking deep inside the rafters and the walls are some unwanted, non-rent-paying squatters. Well, ok, it’s really not the spider factory…BUT when spiders the size of silver dollars keep popping up everywhere, you kind of start wondering if there is some sort of spider mill being used as a side business.

Unfortunately for me, I am terrified of spiders so the last several weeks at work have been daunting, to say the least.  Since we’ve been in our current building,we have had them, but mostly the smaller ones. Smaller ones I can deal with…sort of…ok, eww! But the mamas and the papas are definitely not on my list of fondness.

There has to be some major nest or something because this is the worst I have ever seen them. Approximately ten to fifteen of these unwelcome slackers show up throughout the work day. One even had the nerve to crawl on a fellow coworker’s toe. Considering how frightened she is of them, she actually handled the incident very well. I’m sure I would have been in hysterics and would have had to leave for the rest of the day, taking a temporary leave of insanity! I have the chills right now just thinking about it!

Fortunately for us, we have a superhero who swoops in and saves the day. I call him…duh, duh, duh, dummm…The Spider Whisperer. No, he doesn’t actually whisper to the creepy crawlies but anytime there is a bug to be dealt with, he is at our beck and call…tissue in hand, ready to squish at a moment’s notice. No bug is too big or too small. He takes care of the job that we frightened scaredy cats are unable to handle.

The Spider Whisperer

I can’t begin to count the number of times he’s saved me from being paralyzed with fear in my office, trapped because a monster spider was on the wall next to the door and I couldn’t get out. He even saved the coworker from the spider with the toe fetish! It was amazing and heroic!!

They sprayed our offices when we all left this past Friday. I’m hoping for the best when I return. An office building free of those squatters so that we all can go back to the way things used to be. A place where only stink bugs, ants and flies are welcome because that’s all we scaredy cats can handle…sort of…ok, double eww!!

But if any outbreaks of unwanted eight-legged creatures happen, The Spider Whisperer will be right there, tissue in hand , ready to mix it up and save the day once again…thank goodness!

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Categories: All Things Icky, ~Random Madness~ | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

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14 thoughts on “Plop, Plop…Squish, Squish…Oh What A Relief It Is!

  1. Agatha82

    HATE spiders – Maybe this will give you a laugh because I was in hysterics over the funny drawings:
    http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/03/spiders-are-scary-its-okay-to-be-afraid.html

    Hope the creepy crawlies are gone on your return. I would have already had a nervous breakdown…EEEEEK

    • I just read the link that you left…that is absolutely hysterical!! Thanks for sharing!

      P.S. I didn’t see any spiders today at work, but I’m skeptical…they may have taken a vacation day or something!

  2. Fun post. Glad you have a superhero in your midst to save the day.

    Most spiders don’t bother me. As long as there are no snakes dropping from the rafters, or scorpions running over my barefeet, I’m cool.

  3. I cringe at spiders. I used to dream that a huge spider was dropping off the ceiling swinging from a cord of silken web about to drop on my face and engulf me in her kiss of death! Shriek!!! I always woke up at that point finding there was no spider anywhere but in my dream (or nightmare). Thank you for sharing your “spidy fight”! Poor spiders. They are misunderstood. What can I say?

  4. Yeah, I don’t like spiders either. Especially the ones that move all jerky and fast.

  5. Bravo! Bravo! Great Story!

  6. Being someone who knows firsthand what you’re talking about – I agree wholeheartedly with your double eww! Thank goodness for the spider whisperer – he’s a great guy!

  7. Ruth

    I have no problem with spiders, mice, rats, or most other creatures. What I do fear, and fear is probably not a strong enough word, is cockroaches. I can barely spell the word. But I fear them with all the cells of my being. I have cried, pleaded, begged and pay strangers to kill them on sight. Thank God I don’t have them where I live now, but seeing them on the sidewalk at night or hallway in a building will send me into a panic that is almost faint-inducing – but spiders – a good swing of a broom will do the job.

    • Ruth, I think I can safely say that I can’t stand any of the “creatures” you mentioned! My skin is definitely crawling right now just thinking about them!!!!

      Lady bugs…I think that’s all that I can tolerate. I actually set them free.

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